Friday, November 13, 2009

The Jury Has Reached A Decision

After literally sleeping on it for a couple of nights now, the jury, (for that would be me), has reached a verdict on the new bed.

It's a winner.

I couldn't give this verdict yesterday morning as I went to bed the previous night with a bit of back ache already, my life. I couldn't get a pain free sleeping position for a few hours and had a crappy night really. Although I woke with no pain, I didn't want to base my decision on THAT night and so I've left it until this morning.

Last night I slept like a baby, except my arms never went over my head in true baby fashion. I'd get terrible pins and needles if I tried that at my age. I woke with no aches or pains and could've lain there for ages if the smell of 'perked' coffee hadn't drawn me out of the bedroom like some sort of Disney cartoon character following the trail of a newly cooked apple pie.

Not so good was my voice. For a few days now I've had a sore throat but like a true brave man, I've not made a big thing about it and managed to keep the hacking, almost debilitating, coughing to a minimum. But yesterday morning I woke up talking like a cross between Darth Vadar and Sean Connery and annoyed everyone by constantly telling them about Luke being my son and that and we should rise up to defeat The English.

The depth of my voice changed again this morning and if only I could hold a note, I could do a decent voice over as Barry White. As it is, my rendition of "You're My First, My Last, My Everything" would win most karaoke competitions and get me into Florida's Got Talent, if such a show existed.

So anyway, the bed is a hit and now I'm just waiting for the combi oven to be delivered. Hopefully Homeland Security aren't watching my credit card purchases or I'll have an even harder time convincing them I don't really live here year round.







2 comments:

Daphne said...

Great news about the bed - not so good news about the voice. I hope that either a couple of good nights' sleep will sort it, or that you'll enter - and win - the Pan-Florida Barry White Impersonation Contest. Or you could perhaps try out your version of "I was born under a wanderin' star" as I think that might go well in your new voice.

jay said...

Glad to hear about the bed! That's a thumb-up, then?

"yesterday morning I woke up talking like a cross between Darth Vadar and Sean Connery and annoyed everyone by constantly telling them about Luke being my son and that and we should rise up to defeat The English. "

ROFL!! You have a wonderful turn of phrase, my friend. I hope you feel better soon. If not, perhaps you should look into doing voice-overs for horror movie trailers. They need someone with a gravelly monotone. That other guy who does them surely must be retiring soon, and by the sound of things, he is the one only doing it.

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