So yesterday I went for my first BIG shop and thinking back, it probably wasn't wise to have done so on a Bank Holiday Monday.
I hate people who don't go to the seaside on a Bank Holiday ! What's wrong with you ? I know it was 45F and raining but come on people, it's traditional. Doing so clears out the city centres so I can go shopping in peace. It's somewhere in the Magna Carta or Doomsday Book or some such document.
A Bank Holiday means you MUST go to the coast and freeze your bollocks off.
Actually, thinking of freezing your whatsits off, are those Olympian track athletes in for a shock when they come here in a couple of months. These days they seem to run in their underwear and not much else so they'd better be prepared for goosebumps. And they'd better create new record categories......."100 Metre World Record For Running Through Puddles".
But I digress.
So yesterday, with half the nation stuck inside watching The Sound of Music or The Great Escape, I went to our almost local Tesco's Extra and the clue is in the name - it sells much more than groceries. I went there because as well as needing groceries, I wanted to look at some televisions as I want to replace my old box with its antique cathode ray tube beaming images onto a screen the size of an iPad.
I want BIG. I want FLAT SCREEN. I want 3D. I want INTERNET.
I want a bank loan !
I do like shopping for things with plugs on the end of them as I really believe electricity was invented just for my benefit. I embrace it and I feel it's my duty to buy every gadget that uses it.
You can see why I'm still single at 59 !
Anyway the TV dept at Tesco's Extra at Seacroft could be used in training films for how NOT to run a TV dept. It's awful. Truly awful. Ok they do have a decent number of tv's on display for a supermarket but so much of the signage was wrong that it was almost useless. Speaking of useless, the one staff member was the epitome of it. When not sitting at his desk surfing the internet, he was going through the staff doors behind him as if he had a bladder complaint and the toilets were on the other side. I was there for 30 mins or so and he never spoke with a single customer.
They had ONE 3D tv actually showing a 3D dvd and the rest were either powered off or showing in-store adverts. Given their price, don't you think a half decent salesman seeing a customer putting on the 3D glasses and actually taking an interest in the tv would at least leave his desk and ask if he could help ? I mean I WAS showing an interest. I went off to one side to check if the 3D "effects" could be experienced everywhere (they could) and then went back about 12 feet to do the same as that would be my watching distance at home. It was pretty awesome.
But did all this get lazy boy off his la-z-boy ? Did it chuff !
I'd seen enough and wouldn't buy a tv from Tesco's if you paid me. Time to get the groceries.
It was great to walk the aisles with no time limits as it meant I could people watch as well. Tesco's at Seacroft is like a Walmart anywhere but without the motorised scooters. Not one. Actually I'm not sure if they have them which would explain a lot !
Some products and shelf edge labels took my eye and here they are. First up is a bit of a cock up by the head office computer which clearly got its sums a bit wrong........
Then there were these Easter eggs on the 'discounted' shelves and you can see that it wasn't only the price that was halved ! A lot of the chocolate egg seems to have gone with the fairies and once started, I can't see the rest remaining for long ! Soon you could just be buying an empty box.
This next one isn't really amusing but it's just not a product I've ever seen before. Personally I like to be warm in bed so I guess I'd have to do a bit of double bagging !
Sometimes I wonder exactly where I am when shopping in Leeds. Of course research tells us that curry has replaced fish and chips as the favourite British meal and so it's probably apt that the ingredients take up entire shelves in most supermarkets here.
Finally, at the bread section, they also had a discounted area where items that had reached their sell by date were being sold at pretty silly prices. With one eye on nostalgia and memories of my mother's baking, I just had to get this bread........for 25p (40 cents). I feel a Sunday morning Ulster Fry could be on the cards !
And look, there are carrots in my cart. And bananas. Hiding the donuts and half an Easter egg maybe (well I had to get it !) but come on.....fruit AND veg !!!!!
With my cart full and my bank account emptied, it was time to head home. With no one returning from the seaside, at least the roads were clear.
I like Bank Holidays but then, for me, I have 365 of them a year !