Thursday, January 26, 2012

Dog Days In Florida

As the temp hits 85F/29.4c outside and a rather too warm 82F/28c inside, it's time to close the doors and windows and turn on the air conditioning.

Apart from not being able to see the laptop screen for sweat in my eyes, the other sign that it's too warm in here is to look at Pixie, our small long haired dachshund. She just flops down on the carpet wherever her little legs have taken her.

She has several bed options and when the mornings were chillier a few weeks ago, she loved to leave her living room bed and stroll out to the lanai and lie in a sunbeam. She'd even move as the sunbeam crossed the floor as the morning passed into the afternoon.

A dog's life ? You betcha.

But as well as protecting us from rogue sunbeams, she also "protects" us from the approach of strangers. And friends. And the Fedex driver. And other dogs. And cats, rabbits, birds and gators. Basically she'll bark at the approach of anything with a pulse. Us included.

Of course once a human actually comes right up the drive to the screen door, she'll stand threateningly on the other side until they speak to her and then she'll roll over on her back and all four stumpy legs will quiver with excitement at the idea of her tummy being rubbed.

Experts in canine evolution are as yet uncertain if this survival policy is any use whatsoever but as long haired dachshunds are not an endangered species, I have to think it's a pretty damn clever policy.

I suspect possums learned it from dachshunds and then took it one stage further.

But like most teenagers, Pixie has to earn her keep around the house so as well as fending off over friendly gators and directionally challenged snakes, she does her chores. One of these chores is to vacuum the kitchen floor and this she does with enthusiasm after the preparation of every meal.

Be it fixing basic cereal or using a multitude of ingredients to prepare a mouthwatering evening meal, once we've left the kitchen for the dining table, Pixie moves in to sweep up. Actually she likes to move in BEFORE we leave but tends to get shouted at and runs the risk of being stepped on. It's often a risk she feels is worth taking !

In the kitchen, she comes into her own. Nature may have given her short legs and an undersized body but these are perfect physical attributes for getting her snout into every corner of the kitchen floor. Speaking of snouts, her's would put an anteater to shame.

It's like the attachment on a vacuum cleaner and she uses it just as effectively.

The downside to this behaviour is that she often picks up items that are both unwanted and inedible as her hovering isn't confined to the kitchen floor. The lanai itself is fair game as is the laundry room, bathrooms and bedrooms. Ironically she's worked out that 'goodies' are seldom if ever to be found around the carpeted edges of the living room so we just have to vacuum in here ourselves ! Pah !!

Given this ability to get into every corner of the house, we're used to seeing Pixie wandering around with all sorts of things 'stuck' onto the end of her nose. These are usually small bits of tissue, paper or fluff and it's only after this sight has given us a good laugh that we restore her dignity by removing them for her.

A few minutes ago the heat got to her and I heard a little sighhhhh as she plopped on the carpet near my chair. This is the sight that greeted me.........




Who's a good little hovering up girl, then ??!!!

6 comments:

Jay at The Depp Effect said...

Aw .. she's a sweetie, isn't she?

Mine don't hoover, unless it's something extra tasty. Cheese, bits of meat, or crumbs of cake or biscuit get hoovered, but for some reason, vegetables, bread, cereal, orange peel and gummy bears etc can just sit on the floor till they rot for all these two dogs care!

JeannetteLS said...

Just found you through My Dad's a Communist. I'm in love with Pixie. But, then I liked your Eurozone crisis solving. Reminded me of my idea of the American crisis solving.

Frankly it is fun to read blogs that are the antithesis to my own, which would probably lead a person to believe that I am humorless and close to morose.

Regardless, I am glad that I found your blog and can follow what seems to be an interesting retirement. I am excited at the idea of turning sixty and pretty much feel as if I am just getting started.

Enough of my drivel. I still would like to steal Pixie.

Jennyta said...

Our new one, Jake enjoys drinking the dregs of my coffee or tea whenever he gets the chance. Can't get either of them to do the hoovering though!

Silverback said...

Blimey, Jay, you sure 'keep' a lot of food on your floors ;-)

JLS...thanks for visiting. I never mind getting Daphne's readers ! As for stealing Pixie, I think she likes being in Florida too.

Jenny...you obviously need to adopt Jay's philosophy regarding crummage !

rhymeswithplague said...

That is too funny!

rhymeswithplague said...

The dog, I mean....

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