Please Speak Slowly.

The British have a habit of wanting to shout slowly at Johnny Foreigner as if doing both of these things will make the poor tourist understand what we're talking about.

We really do assume their faces will light up with comprehension as the sentence that totally baffled them moments ago will suddenly become almost as clear as if it were in their native tongue, now that it's been spoken much more slowly AND at an increased volume.

"Ahhhhh", they say with wide smiles on their faces, "the street on the museum is in my grandmother's undergarments. Thanks you very good" And off they go to get thoroughly lost but with a continental skip in their step and we rightly believe that we've cracked Romanian and what language can we master next.

Leeds, city of culture ! Yeah right. Even most Brits need a phrase book when coming here.

But it works both ways of course. I give you this entry from a travel site that I came across today.......that had the title of "Leeds And Urban Centre - Starring Instruction Inwards A Car Hire"

I guess that should've hinted at just how low the language bar had been set.

I paste the entry here with no further comments needed from me - although several came to mind. Oh hell yes.

Oh ok let me add one. Never, never, never put a block of text into an online translation site and expect what comes out the other end to be ANYTHING like the results you'd want.

The United Kingdom that comprises four countries of Great britain, Scotland, Cambria and Irish free state is a trustworthy tourists’ paradise dominion it not only when abounds inwards places of historic curiosity, castles, forts, palaces, memorials, civil rights activist, gardens and museums but also relic a heartbeat center for sports, artistic creation, and cultural events. What could be a advisable choice to see this vast gainly and nature precocious Turkish empire than travel by way to explore its rich diversities? Take a transaction car and be on your personal to make advisable of your blunder to the UK.