Monday, April 21, 2008

Piping Hot - The Sequel

Sad to report, at 4:50am it happened again this morning and once again it woke me up.

This time I lay in bed for the 10 or so minutes that it took to fill the loft tank and then all went quiet again. Before I'd gone to bed at 2am, I'd checked the hot water tank in the back bedroom and as it had had an hour or so of Economy 7 power, it was hot right to the bottom.

After this rude wake up I dragged my sleepy carcass out of bed and checked it again. Sure enough it was only hot right at the top and was buzzing away heating up again. So it looks to me as though I'm expensively heating this flaming tank and then at 4:50am the hot water somehow flows UP to the loft pipes and pours into the tank up there. Why this loft tank should be so empty is another puzzle. It normally fills up on a trickle feed as I use the water in the kitchen and bathroom etc.

It's all very bizarre. And slightly worrying. And will probably cost a fortune to sort out. Of course it doesn't seem to be causing an actual problem so in my usual way, I'll probably do nothing until it does. However, being woken at 5am every morning might be the push I need to get the rip off merchants, sorry, local plumbing experts in to sort it all out.

I just KNOW what will happen.

"Hey Billy ! Come up here and have a look at this pipework."

Billy joins his expert colleague and myself in my loft.

"Good lord, Arthur. This really is a right mess and no mistake"

"Now now, Billy. Lets not say things like that in front of the owner. Don't want to worry him, you know"

"What was I thinking, Arthur. Yes it's not exactly up to code, Sir, but we'll have it all sorted for you in no time. No time at all. You just nip down and fix us both a nice pot of tea. Milk and 2 sugars and some jaffa cakes would go down a treat."

I leave them to it.

"Holy shit, Billy, we're on a nice little earner here. This idiot knows nothing and we can have 3 weeks in Benidorm on this one. Look at these pipes. Some are made of wood for gawds sake.
Go fetch all the impressive tools and we'll bang around up here for a couple of days and, oh sod Benidorm, this loser is going to pay for the wife and kids going to Disney World !!! Happy days."

I think it's time to move house.


Jennyta said...

Do I detect a note of cynicism there, Ian???

CLS said...

I can't even concieve of the piping you describe but the surplus of water vapor in the roof joists can't be good! Looking forward to further information re: your being in hot water! :)

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