Farewell Buttonwood Bay - Hello Leeds

I'm home ! And it's cold.......very cold.

First let me take you back to last Wednesday when things were a lot warmer and that evening was the 50's dance in Buttonwood Bay. Deb had done magic with a load of material from WalMart and somehow conjured up a skirt and attachments straight out of the 'Peggy Sue Got Married' movie and others of that genre. She'd even sewed a pink poodle complete with sequined lead onto the skirt. As we entered the hall, heads turned and smiles were everywhere. That might have been the drink though (as we were 40 minutes late as we thought it started at 7:30pm but it was 7:00pm) as it was a BYOB function and plenty was brought. It was like a SAGA trip to a brewery !

Anyway everyone danced and ate and chatted and generally had a fabby time to the music from a different generation and once again I was amazed by the energy and physical output from my fellow residents. Plus it was nice to leave without my ears buzzing for hours afterwards.

I'd spent most of the day packing up my belongings and thankfully was able to leave a few items behind to be stored in our 'soon-to-be' new home in the park for my return later this year. So on Thursday I didn't have much to do before getting in the rental car at noon and heading off to the motel in Tampa.

Bright and early the next morning, Friday, it was only a 20 minute drive to the airport and as I got there 2 hrs early, I was delighted to find they had free wi-fi internet available and so I was able to check and send a few emails and have quick chats with anyone who was up and online at that early hour. Other aiports take note.........FREE wi-fi please.

I just must mention the security at Tampa was first class and ultra modern. No old fashioned, but nevertheless sightly more sexually pleasing, manual searches here ! Oh no. I stepped into a glass sided booth and had air blown up, down and generally in all directions over my body which was like having a dry shower. I exited feeling refreshed, clean and with bits of me tingling from the experience. Never mind every airport having one, I think every home should have one too. I wanted to go round again !

You know the way traffic slows down as it passes an accident ? Rubber necking is one term for it. Well the security line had a similar slowdown as men would pause to watch any skirt wearing lady who happened to be in the booth at the time. All I can say is - imagine that infamous Marilyn Monroe footage with the air not only blasting from below and you'll get the picture.

Onboard my flight to Detroit, I had a row of seats to myself and watched in some comfort as the scene below me changed from one of green and warm to white and cold. Thankfully my delicate body wasn't exposed to it at this point in the trip and after the 3 hr flight, I settled in at Detroit airport to a wait of over 5 hours before my next flight out.

Here is a photo of one of the least glamorous jobs in the world.......de-icing a Jumbo jet. Well I had 5 hrs to pass so had to watch something.

I was glad to not have any more security checks to go through as, despite enjoying the novelty of warm air blasts, they are a necessary inconvenience at best these days and a pain in the ass if I have to open up my carry on luggage.

The transatlantic leg of the trip was as long and mind numbingly boring as ever and once again I yearned for the days of Concorde when my trips were over in a third of the time. Yea right. The closest I got to a Concorde was at some airport when one passed by the window of the plane I was on and made a noise usually only experienced by those who were up front at a Who concert in the 70's.

During the 8 hr flight I watched 3 movies in between the arrival of the drinks trolley, the main meal trolley, the duty free trolley, the drinks trolley again and the pre landing snack trolley. I picked "The Queen", which wasn't too bad but seemed more documentary than movie, "Flyboys" which was from the old school of formulaic war movies as it degenerated into soppy sentimentality as well as having an obvious ending. In a final effort to make the trip more pleasant, I picked "The Incredibles" which always makes me smile, even at 90,000 ft or whatever height we were at.

We landed on time at Amsterdam airport (by now it was Saturday morning) and next stop, albeit after another flight, was glorious sunny Leeds. Yes sunny. Not a cloud in the sky and sadly, not a degree of heat in the air. Eee by gum it were nippy. It was my first exposure to the air since leaving Tampa and it came as quite a shock to my system. Oh it wasn't as cold as in Detroit of course but it's all relative and this time I was out in it !!

A taxi ride later and I was home sweet home. Was glad to see it looked fine on first inspection and as expected, once inside I could see my breath so heat was the priority. I turned on the gas supply and lit the fire. The flames didn't seem as 'strong' as I'm used to but I'd no time to think about that and went to get the central heating boiler going. I couldn't. No amount of trying would get the pilot light to work and that meant no heat. I rang the gas company as I'm covered insurance wise and the best they could do was send someone the next day.....meaning today, Sunday.

I spent the evening wrapped in all the warm clothing I could get on me but it was still uncomfortably cold in here.......it crawled to 42F and in an effort to get warmer, I left to go shopping as I'd nothing other than tinned soup in the old larder. After giving the car battery a zap, it fired up and I slowly set off for Sainsburys, gingerly giving the brakes lots of touches on the way. The car had been on the driveway for exactly 6 months after all.

I'd been looking forward to seeing my new look store as it had had a refurbishment while I was away. Oh what a huge disappointment it was. No, it was much more than that, it was awful. The store I'd left back in August was quite nice and modern so I'd assumed the refurbishment would've only added to that.......as it should. The only way I can describe it now is that it reminds me of a city centre Netto (for my UK readers) or a Save-a-Lot (for my US ones). Sorry international readers, you're on your own !!

I know it was a Saturday evening and so it was busy and with lots of staff along the aisles stacking the shelves but still........it was just a mess. They'd added more non food lines as you'd expect these days with clothing and kitchenware and electronic goodies etc, but my impression was that there was even less choice in the staples of supermarket fare, food ! And the checkouts ! I'm sure they were taken from some store which went into receivership as they were just plain nasty and showed up the poor flooring where the old ones used to be.

But, hey, it was WARM. I basked in the heat and almost slapped on some sun cream. Sadly I had to get my frozen goodies to my frozen home and so had to leave. I'd had my bed's electric blanket turned on since I left and by the time I finally went up to get in, it was toasty warm. I'd been up for 38 hrs and slept like a log till the gas man came knocking at 9:30am. He found the gas jet was blocked, probably by a dead spider or it's cobweb, and in no time the boiler was going and the heat was on.

It's now a very tropical 70F in here and I'm thinking of getting out my flip-flops. Life is good.

I'm watching the Corrie omnibus now and thinking of dunking a ginger biscuit in a mug of tea in a while. I'm slowly morphing into my Brit self again.

It's good to be home. Gives me a warm feeling. Well, eventually that is.

Squirrels

It's coming to the end of my time here in Buttonwood Bay (I leave on Thursday) and I thought I ought to give 15 minutes of fame to the most common critter in the park......well apart from those tiny ones of a flying nature which have not bothered me as much as I feared they would.

In one of my first posts from here last year I mentioned that I had been taking sunset photos down by the lake late one afternoon and once the sun went down, the mozzies came out and found my tender Brit skin to their liking. After only a few minutes of painful snapping, I was left looking like a teenager with rampant acne and I vowed never to give them the opportunity to repeat the meal.

Using a combination of moving pretty much non stop (looking like Patrick Litchfield on E) and running off like a big jessie as soon as the sun dipped below the horizon, I've managed to get lots of sunset photos and still remain almost bite free ever since that infamous afternoon.

No the critters I want to highlight here are the squirrels who populate most areas of the park but come out in numbers down by the lake - and mostly at sunset.

I can only assume they have become used to the residents who gather by the waters edge to celebrate the end of each day (or more likely that they've survived another day) by sitting in their golf carts and watching a light show that nature does so well.

It used to be that many residents would feed these squirrels and so they'd actually jump onto the carts and practically take the offerings out of hands.........probably nipping a few arthritic fingers in the process.

This practice was frowned upon and we were told to desist in no uncertain terms. They were becoming pests (the squirrels, not the residents) and it was only a matter of time before we'd lose a resident to their sharp teeth.

But no one thought to tell the many friends, family and guests who came to the park and stayed for a while.....especially over the holidays.

I saw numerous instances of feeding going on and it's hard to chastise a grandson or granddaughter when they look so cute covered from head to foot in squirrels.

The young Davy Crocketts would squeal with delight at being surrounded by these critters and many a doting grandparent had their work cut out chasing them away with the ends of their walking sticks or, as I witnessed on one hilarious occasion, by zooming around after them on their golf carts. It was a scene worthy of a Monty Python sketch and will remain vividly in my mind for years to come.

So the other day I headed down to the lake and had the whole wooded area to myself to start with. I sat down on one of the picnic tables and waited. Like in a scene from a Disney movie, one by one the curious little squirrels came out from wherever they'd been hiding and came towards me. Now remember we're talking Disney here and not Hitchcock or Stephen King so there were no demonic red eyes to be seen anywhere and even less slobbering/drooling going on. There wasn't any creepy shrill violin music either. It was all a very enchanted forest, chocolate box sweet sort of occasion and while most of the squirrels darted about with little aim or purpose, some went on with the things that squirrels do best - scratching themselves, digging up or burying food, scratching themselves and did I mention scratching themselves ? Well they did that a lot.

In fact this particular squirrel (see above) managed to multitask by trying to stare me down while at the same time it's rear leg was going like the proverbial fiddlers elbow.

In this first shot, the stare had been going for about 30 seconds and was becoming quite disturbing to me.

I've seen a few movies where people die and return as animals (the excellent, if somewhat sentimental Fluke being my favourite) and I was starting to believe this squirrel was trying to send me a message.

I was very pleased when it started to have a good scratch as I took this to be a sign that nothing of a human nature was going on as humans would never sit at a picnic table, stare off into the distance and scratch themselves. Well not without a beer and several burps anyway.

I used a slow shutter speed to highlight the speed of movement going on at the back and this only emphasised the rock steady stare going on at the other end.

When one made it all the way along my table and up to my left elbow, I decided it was time to move on. I'd given them 15 minutes of my time and now they've had 15 of yours.

That should be enough for any budding squirrel celeb.

Some Events Defy Understanding

At about 3:50pm last Friday, we were driving back along US-27 towards our winter 'home' in Buttonwood Bay when we were passed by 3 police canine vehicles going south like proverbial bats out of hell. It was unusual enough to elicit a few comments about what might have been going on, but that was it.

As we approached the entrance to the park, we saw a few more police cars but again, thought nothing of it. A short while after that, while visiting with friends inside the park, we saw and heard police and tv station helicopters flying overhead and by then we'd learned that a Florida Highway Patrol officer, Sgt Nicholas Sottile, had been shot and killed after a routine traffic stop just a few miles down the road.

Over the next few days, the story naturally dominated local news and much was said about it any time residents gathered within the park. To quote the local news report...............Joshua Lee Altersberger, 19, allegedly shot 48-year-old Sottile in the neck Friday afternoon when the trooper pulled him over for reckless driving on U.S. 27 north near Cloverleaf Road.

Maybe it's because this was easily the closest I've been to a crime of any sort that it affected me so much. Maybe it was the absolute senselessness of the crime that's made it hard to shake from my mind. Maybe it's that this area seemed so safe and relatively crime free to me since I got here 3 months ago that's made this murder all the more disturbing. I guess all of these are reasons for me never to forget trooper Sottile and why hundreds of residents, me included, went out to the park entrance today just after 2pm to stand in line as the funeral procession drove by.
There was a wish, nay a need, to stand together and honour a man who put his life on the line for 24 years and who deserved to be with his wife and family for many happy years of retirement.

Instead he was killed by some 19 year old deadbeat who, as they were being pulled over, told his passenger that he was going to shoot the officer and this prompted the passenger to flee the scene before it happened. I'm sure family and friends of Sgt Sottile are asking the question.......why didn't this passenger shout a warning to the officer ??? I know I am.

In any case, events took their course and now a wife is a widow and a family is without a father - a man who by all accounts was a credit to his job and the community he served so faithfully till the end.

And so we got in our golf carts, climbed on our bikes or simply walked out to the edge of US-27 and waited for the procession to go past us taking the body of Sgt Sottile on his final 10 mile journey back to Lake Placid.

I once counted the number of 'lots' within the park and got a figure of 940. Some lots are, of course, vacant for one reason or another but if one says that most occupied residences have 2 occupants, then a rough estimate of the total number of residents would come to 1800.


It seemed to me that all of them were out lining US-27 this afternoon. There were a few signs being held up and although this one would seem to have been created by a Hallmark writer, no one could deny it summed up the mood today.

I don't know how many of those by the roadside had ever experienced such a procession before, but it was a first for me. I didn't know what to expect and if asked prior to seeing it, I'd have said I expected 20 or so police cars, maybe a couple of motorbikes and a few unmarked cars would be the sum total. Boy did I ever underestimate the turnout !!!

About 20 minutes before the main procession came over the hill and into sight, about 30 or more police cars and motorbikes had already gone past us with every possible combination of their lights flashing and strobing impressively.

Then came the start of a procession which took well over 40 minutes to pass us and I really hope someone somewhere counted the number of offical police vehicles that took part because I'd love to know that figure.

As usual my attention was mostly taken up with these photographs so I'd not like to even make a guess but it was certainly a very impressive number. think about it.......how many cars can go by in 40 minutes ? Many hundreds.

At the head of the main procession were the motorcyclists and there could have been 50 of them alone.

Just as I was composing a shot which would have shown most of them in an impressive line, the gentleman with the sign (from photo 2) decided to get it out as far as possible and blocked off most of the line.

This rushed photo of the cyclists was the best I could get as the procession wasn't hanging around and must've been travelling at 20-25mph.


After these cyclists came the hearse surrounded by it's own cordon of bikes.

By now every resident was eager to pay their respects and were inching further and further onto the road - and in doing so were getting in my line of sight.

I only had the opportunity to get this view of the hearse approaching and then the next shot as it sped away down the road.

At this point there was total silence from the residents who stood either saluting the coffin or had their right arms crossed onto their chests with the hand on heart. It was very moving and I'm sure was appreciated by the family, friends and colleagues of Sgt Sottile.

The sun was blazing down and the temp in the shade was 82F so heaven knows what it was out there on US-27. We'd been there for over an hour by this time but no one was leaving.

After the hearse had gone past, the mood changed slightly and we felt the need to let those officers following behind know how we felt.

Some clapping took place and most of the vehicles received a wave and we got appreciative waves back from them. There were a couple of amusing sights when one patrol car went past with the passenger fast asleep (well it was very hot and I'm sure it had been a long day for him......bless) and then another went by with an opened box of Dunkin Donuts on the dashboard. How typical !!!

We didn't expect the waves back and maybe the officers had been told to not make any gestures at all - but if they were, then thankfully many ignored that request and returned our simple gestures. Many drivers squawked their sirens for a nano second too.

I noticed that many of those in the back seats were taking photos of us which was understandable. Photos provide memories forever and who could deny a friend or family member a record of how many people had turned out to pay their respects.

The photo above gives some impression of the scale of this procession. The hearse had long gone ahead but we kept seeing these police vehicles streaming nose to tail down the road - representing every county in the state and many other states too. They came from Naples and Sarasota, from Miami and Orlando, from Louisiana and New Jersey.

There were vehicles representing every department and area of law enforcement imaginable from canine units to drug enforcement and even corrections.

The governor of Florida came too.

It was quite a sight and one I'll never forget.

The park administators had done an excellent job of letting everyone know about the procession and we were grateful to have been given the opportunity to show our feelings about this incredibly tragic event.

Buttonwood Bay prides itself on it's sense of being an active part of the local community and this turnout proved that when one 'of our own' is taken in this awful way, then we will show our solidarity and let those officers left behind know that we appreciate everything they do for us day in and day out.

In many ways this was a very American procession but it did let me see that even in a nation where the killing of a police officer is hardly news worthy anymore, that when that officer is a decent man who has served his community well for almost a quarter of a century, then his killing will not go unheralded or unnoticed by that community.

The murder of Sgt Sottile was tragic. It was pointless, senseless and totally unnecessary. In this gun crazy nation where 19yr old punks drive around with guns in their door pockets and decide, seemingly on a whim, to kill a police officer, then it might make me worry about the future here.

But if those feelings try and overwhelm me, I can think of the events today and realise that the vast majority of Americans are honest and lawabiding as well as kind and generous to a fault. They have an unswerving pride in, and love of, their country and will defend it and it's laws to the death.

Sgt Sottile was one such American and he died defending those laws.

I didn't know the man but his legacy to me is that I'll never forget him.

May he rest in peace.

Gators Rule

I'm not a superstitious person by nature, not at all.

I'm not much into coincidences either. Nope, not me.

A few weeks ago I posted that my adopted state college football team, the Michigan Wolverines, had been soundly beaten by their deadly rivals, the Ohio State Buckeyes and this result for the previously undefeated Wolverines pushed them down to 3rd place in the national table and meant they had to take part in the lesser Rose Bowl last Monday (which they also lost) rather than contest the National Championship game which has been taking place tonight.

Still with me ? Ok.

So the two teams contesting the Championship game are those dastardly Buckeyes and the team which jumped from 3rd place to 2nd place and replace the Wolverines, namely the Florida Gators.

Now as this park I'm in is located in central Florida, the Gators would have to classed as the local team and so the one to root for tonight. The fact that they are playing the team 'we' in Michigan all love to hate, makes supporting the Gators even more of a given. The thing is, very few residents here are from Florida - which makes sence if you think about it. I'm not sure of the exact numbers but I'd say that the vast majority of residents are split pretty evenly between the snowbirds of Michigan and those of Ohio.

For days now, Buckeye flags and banners have been fluttering outside many homes here and I really felt that they'd romp home in the game tonight as they are a formidable outfit. Pains me to say that, but credit where it's due and all that.

So where does the superstition and/or coincidence come in ? Well when I rode down to the cafe on the lake for my lunchtime healthy option meal (yea right) today, I couldn't believe my eyes. There on a little sandbank just about 40ft from the cafe and all the people sitting enjoying their food - was the park gator that I'd been told wasn't around anymore !

I shot back up the hill to the 5th wheel and grabbed my camera and prayed that Mr. Gator would still be there on my return.

I needn't have worried as he was going nowhere. I got a few shots at different angles and then went along the few yds to get my burger. I took it back to the sandbank and munched it while watching this awesome beast.

Sure it was only about 4 or 5 feet long but apart from those almost tame gators that you see on show at Sea World or at some other entertainment complex, this was my first true wild gator. Apart from slight movements of it's beady eyes, it never moved a muscle. Despite having a 200mm lens, I wanted to get closer and so, showing a total lack of common sence and respect that the late Steve Irwin would've been proud of, I went around the fence (that provided no protection anyway) and edged along the grass until Mr. Gator decided I'd gone far enough and raised his head slightly.

Never has such a small movement away from my body caused such a large movement inside my body !

I took a VERY shaky photo and backed up to, and around, the relative safety of that fence and decided that gator stalking was not my 'thang'.

As happens on such occasions, my cowardice (and the dampness down my inner thigh) lessened and I felt foolish that this docile looking critter had evoked such terror in me just by raising it's head. It couldn't have closed the distance between us, I felt. I was never in any sort of danger, I felt. I was up for another attempt, I felt. Just then someone came along the path with a large dog which started to bark when it saw the gator. The next few seconds were a blur and all I saw was an explosion of noise and water as the gator shot off the sandbank and disappeared into the swamp. I stood open mouthed at the demonstration of raw power and speed and was very glad for that dog coming along when it did or else yours truely might have been gator food by now. Well ok maybe I'd have got a nasty bite, more likely.

In any case I was so glad to have seen the park gator with only 2 weeks to go till I leave here. But then I got to thinking......why today ? I've been here for almost 3 months with no sign of the gator and suddenly today, he appears and poses for photos. Then I remembered the game. Surely not. Surely it wasn't a sign that the total underdogs, the Florida Gators, would win ???
I mean the Buckeyes hadn't been beaten all season after all.

The game finished just a few minutes ago and the score.........Buckeyes 14 - Gators 41.

Coincidence ? I will let you make up your own minds, gentle readers.

Another January Scorcher

You just can't beat an early January dip in the pool, followed by a cold drink as the scorching sun dries you off.

While most of the northern hemisphere seems to be enjoying above average temperatures - ok apart from Colorado which seems to be getting the sum total of everyone elses snow right now - we here in sunny central Florida are enjoying it too.

It's a bit different here though as we're not 10 degrees or so above the average 30's and 40's of the rest of America, but 10 degrees above the 75's that are normal here at this time of year. According to the National Weather Service site, it's currently 82F in Sebring and it's 5:10pm. I think we made the right decision on Thursday to buy a place in the park and I'm not looking forward to leaving in just over 2 weeks time.

This morning we went out on our golf cart to take a few pics to send to someone who is thinking of coming here with a view to buying a place in the park. I thought I'd share a few here.

This one shows one of my fav places in the park as it's where I go to watch sunsets and generally find solitude and a wonderful sence of peace.

The trail path (in white here) runs along the edge of Lake Josephine and I've been along it's length many times on foot, in our golf cart and on my bike.

The pier can be seen through the trees and provides both an aesthetic addition to the view as well as a practical addition to the lake side.

Just to the left of this location are the bocce courts where I've spent many fun hours over the last few months. You can imagine the beautiful views of the lake we get as we play this strange and addictive game. There are periods of time when one is not actually involved in game play and standing looking over this lake is a great way to pass the time.

This shot shows the 3 bocce lanes and the lake is over to the left. I tend to only play on a Sunday as games during the week start at 9am !

I didn't retire to get up and play games at 9am !!!

The exceptions to this 'rule' are the monthly Men v Women games when I feel it is my duty to turn up and help my fellow males to whip ass - in the nicest friendliest way of course.

Sadly last time, WE were the ones to get our butts smacked although we did have a storming comeback which left the ladies winning by the lowest margin possible. I get one more chance to take part in a 'battle of the sexes' game before I leave for the UK so fingers crossed that normal service will be restored on Wed 17th.

By now it was almost noon and a good time to get a shot of the main pool before hordes of residents came out to take advantge of it in the afternoon.....and they did.

By 2pm it was 85F and the pool was the best place to be in the park. Even with air conditioning, it was too hot to do much of anything indoors and so when we returned then, the pool and surrounding areas were as busy as I've seen them here.

But at noon is was a different scene and apart from a couple of people chatting over on the far side, we had the place to ourselves.

This is not the only pool in the park. Oh heavens no. At the bottom of the gentle hill that we live on - well until we move into our new place of course - is a smaller pool which doesn't get as much attention and long may this continue as it means we have it almost to ourselves.

As this photo shows, it may be smaller than it's big brother, but it's still sizeable by any standards.

When Deb/Den were in the park last April, this pool was their favourite as it was kept warmer than the main pool. For some reason that's not been the case recently and so we've not actually spent much time in it.

Another reason for us going to the big pool more often has to be the acquisition of our golf cart as it makes the trip there much more enjoyable - even if it isn't as good from an exercise point of view.

And on that note, I'll end with a photo which sort of sums up life here in Buttonwood Bay in many respects. In previous posts I've mentioned the use of golf carts and how they dominate vehicular traffic on the park roads.

Well just to the side of the main pool is a large concrete parking area - not for cars, not for bikes, but for, yep, golf carts. Enlarge the photo (just click on it) if you can't read the sign.

On days like today, which lets face it, are most days, the parking bays are all quickly taken up shortly after noon and you have to find alternative parking areas.

When you're approaching 80 or 90 or even older, and fancy a dip in the pool, this lack of parking space isn't a good thing. I'm always pleased to see that no one plays the 'disabled badge' card to get a spot closer to the pool and the policy seems to be that everyone is equal in here - equally old and infirm that is !!

Me ? Oh I just prop my skateboard up against the wall and I'm sorted.

Busy Start To 2007

The year has only just started and things have been happening here in gentle Buttonwood Bay.

We paid a visit to Miami yesterday and while stuck in a traffic jam due to a serious accident on SR-836 near the junction with SR-826, my thoughts drifted back to BB and how much it means to me now. Don't get me wrong - I'm not ready for my hot chocolate and slippers (although I like both) but the slow pace of life here and the friendliness of all the residents have helped me in so many ways. I may poke a little fun at some of the things I've seen here over the last 2 months but for stress reduction, it's hard to fault it.

So as we fumed in the hot truck (the temp on the rear view mirror display rose to 92F and it was 10pm), we all agreed that we wanted to be back 'home' where the only traffic jams tend to be when the players leave a game of bocce ball or shuffleboard and involve a few golf carts.

These feelings were quite relevant as we've been thinking of buying a permanent home here for a few weeks now. Life in the 5th wheel is fine up to a point but it's really only perfect for a couple. There is only one bedroom/bed and so I have to inflate an air bed every night and if Deb or Den get up early, I basically have to get up too - as the air bed is in the living area. There are other matters of privacy that I won't go into but lets just say, we could use more space !

On Tuesday we hooked up with the park realty agent who whizzed us around on her golf cart to view 11 homes up for sale. She'd taken our strict criteria onboard and these were the most appropriate of all the non-manufactured homes for sale in the park. I have to say most were very nice but after seeing the first 10, we were thinking that we were only going to get the place we wanted by combining the best features of the 10 !!

Then we came to one that had only been put on the market that very day and we loved it right away. It didn't have 2 bedrooms but then very few homes here have that anyway. It did have an awesome Florida room with the far end of it set up, via a sliding patio type door, as a private area for relaxing, reading, watching tv or whatever. By adding a futon, we'd have a 'private' room with somewhere to sleep, it's own door access to the bathroom and main living area and just as important, the extra person or persons wouldn't disturb or be disturbed by anyone in the rest of the unit. It was furnished and maintained to a very high level and we saw almost nothing that would need to be done prior to us moving in.

Wednesday, yesterday, was spent on our trip to Miami and so we picked up the discussions on a possible purchase this morning. We worked out the finances and decided to put in an initial offer by contacting the agent. She rang back about 20 mins later with a counter offer from the sellers which wasn't far from what we wanted. A good start. We raised our initial offer a little and that was passed to the sellers and a few minutes later, we had a deal ! Ok most things (and people) move very slowly here in BB as you'd expect - but the speed at which this purchase deal was completed astonished me.

I won't go into details to protect both sides as we mutually agreed that apart from paying a nominal deposit, the closure wouldn't take place until March 30th - so if the sellers decide to change their minds and not sell at all, we could be back to square one. I very much doubt that will happen and so we are, in all but the crossed t's and dotted i's, home owners in delightful Buttonwood Bay in sunny central Florida. Woooohoooo.

The plan is to keep the 5th wheel as it is still wanted for travelling to all those places either not visited before or liked so much, they deserve another visit. Live here in Florida for up to 7 months of the year, Houghton Lake for the other 5 and the 5th wheel for any road trips all year round.

Now THAT'S retirement !

Dog Tired

It was a cold night here in normally warm central Florida - in fact in most of the continental USA. Our Canadian friends sent down a lot of their excess freezing weather and the jet stream did the rest. Thanks a lot, people !

Being the weather freak that I am ( by that I mean I religiously monitor the 3, yes 3, temperature display units in this 5th wheel which show indoor and outdoor temps and I've more weather sites in my favs than just about any other subject - except sport of course), I was expecting it to be cold, but not THAT cold.

I'd bought an electric blanket on our way down here from snowy Michigan at the end of October but that was mainly for the overnight stops twixt there and here. I did NOT expect to have to ever use it once we arrived and so it was packed away in the far recesses of some cupboard.

So last night at midnight or thereabouts, I blew up my inflatable doll....sorry, mattress, threw down the sleeping bag, covered the lot with one of those lovely soft throw blankets and climbed in for the night. I moved one of the little temperature display units so it was in my eyeline as I had a feeling I might be looking at it sometime in the wee small hours - and how right I was.

About 2:45am I woke and my immediate thoughts were........oh heck, I'm cold ! My thoughts are VERY polite and well mannered at 2:45am.

I reached an arm out of the 'not so warm anymore' sleeping bag, grabbed my little keychain torch and flashed the beam on the temperature unit. It was 41F outside and not much warmer inside at 52F. I lay there trying to decide if I could be bothered getting up, finding the electric blanket, introducing it to my sleeping bag and settling back to try and sleep all without totally waking myself up.

I let lazyness win and just curled up inside the sleeping bag and eventually drifted off to sleep - dreaming of being inside a tent near the Pole and some idiot opening the flap and muttering something about having to pee and how he might be some time.

At 8am, Pixie decided to leave the relative comfort of the other end of the 5th wheel as she felt we'd all slept long enough and it was time we were all up and about. And she'd start with me. So she bounced up on top of the soft throw, which she loves, moved slowly up and down my body and finally nestled down on my back, pushing me deeper into the blow up mattress. I didn't move. She then moved onto phase 2 and padded up to my half buried head and started sniffing the back of it. She knows not to lick me and this is the best she can do and it's almost as annoying as I just know her wet tongue is centimeters from my skin and the stress and tension of wondering if she'll brave my anger by taking a sly lick is much worse than if she actually did the deed.

I gave in and got up. I packed up my bedding, deflated the mattress and put it all away. It was still way too cold so I fired up the furnace and left it running for almost an hour until the temp rose to a more comfortable 65F. The sky was blue and the sun was doing it's best but it was still only 50F outside. I fixed coffee and had cereal and decided to go for a walk to try and undo some of the Christmas eating excesses.

I left at 10:45am and as this wasn't a time I'd normally be out and about here, I saw all sorts of new sights for me. I was immediately struck by how busy it was on the park roads. Cars, golf carts, bikers and walkers were all over the place and cheery greetings filled the slightly chilly air. Being the brave (and stupid) Brit I am, I was out in a polo shirt and shorts whilst everyone I paased had on full arctic gear with wooly thermals underneath. You could hear the cracking of joints from afar and asthmatic wheezings mixed with bird songs to create a sort of geriatric dawn chorus.

I strode along with purpose and old fashioned British pride. Longjohns, pah ! Sweat pants, pah. Fleece lined jacket and matching trousers, double pah ! The dew on my thin polo shirt glistened in the morning sun and the soft hairs on my bare legs rapidly congealed with the early signs of ice buildup. Ok, I exaggerate but it was uncomfortably cold for the start of the walk although as I heated up, so did the weather and after 20 minutes or so, I was warm, in full trot mode and enjoying myself.

I went down past the bocce ball courts and as I approached the lake, I came across a gaggle of golf carts (what IS the collective term anyway ??) seemingly being pulled by tiny dogs. Was this some sort of practice for a little known Florida version of the Alaskan Iditarod ? No, it was simply what passes for walking your dog here in Buttonwood Bay. The owners would drive along in their golf carts with little Flossy or Mitzy running behind, alongside or in most cases, ahead. From a distance it looked like the dogs were indeed pulling the golf carts - although given the size of most of the pets here in the park, this would be a feat of strength beyond anything found in the Guinness Book of Records. It was a joy to behold.

I went along the edge of the lake, along several of the park roads and ended up back at the bocce courts and finally at the Cafe On The Lake - which I discovered was closed due to the cold weather ! Wimps. The sign on the side of the unit has a few reasons for the cafe being closed and the staff can cover over the ones which do not apply. The main ones are cold and rain but I noted with some amusement that 'crappy' was there as well. I doubt if that would be enough of a reason on it's own and I think it would always be used in conjunction with one of the other reasons. Like today......the sign said......closed due to cold crappy weather. I'd have thought that a nice warming cup of soup and a 1/2 pound bacon cheeseburger would've been just the thing on a day like today but I guess they know their customers well enough by now and when the temps are under 60F, no one here wants to sit out and eat food and risk hyperthermia. Maybe oxygen tanks freeze up at such 'low' temperatures or walkers ice over or something. I donno. In any case the cafe was closed and I walked back to the 5th wheel to relax after my 90 minute walk.

And to think I would've missed it all if Pixie hadn't decided to use me as her personal treadmill !
God bless her little hairy paws. Same time tomorrow, eh ???

A Merry Christmas To One And All

My first blog on a Christmas Day. Actually it's 11pm here in darkest Florida but back home in Blighty it's Christmas Day so there.

Speaking of darkness, I can't believe how quickly the evenings seem to be lengthening down here near the Equator. I know we're nowhere near the Equator but it sounded good in my head.
Yes a few days ago the sun was setting just after 5pm and by 5:30pm you'd need a torch to see the oldies out walking their dogs.........or sometimes the other way around ! But tonight I happened to glance outside at 5:45pm and it was bright ! I mean bright enough to be teeing up on the 17th hole with some confidence that you'd be in the bar before dark. That bright. And it wasn't even a blue sky day today either....pretty nasty with clouds and heavy rain. So at this rate it should be light till 10pm by the end of next week. I wish.

As a slight aside, a friend here gave us a little gizmo to put on Pixie's collar to help when she goes walkies at night. It's a glass sphere slightly smaller than a golf ball and when activated, it flashes red and certainly catches the eye. It wouldn't be out of place in a disco or even outside a window in certain parts of Amsterdam. That's hearsay of course !!

Anyway we dutifully strapped it onto Pixie's collar and right away we saw it wouldn't do....oh no, wouldn't do at all. Being a long haired miniature dachshund, she's slung so low to the ground that the ball was dragging along as she walked. This may have been partly due to her not liking it and so dropping her head even more than nature intended.



She does not like wearing ANYTHING and previous attempts to get her into so called 'cute' doggie attire have failed miserably. She'd stand still, look up pathetically at us and refuse to budge until the offending article was removed. She'd never get on in Hollywood.


This is a photo from 2000 and her first winter. We thought she'd appreciate a little jacket to keep her warm outside - but as you can see, the phrase 'hangdog expression' was seemingly created just for her.
The sensible warm jacket was returned and world order was restored.

So when we had to remove the flashing ball, she felt she'd won again. The ball was removed and she was a happy pooch. We saw it as a draw really as we never take her walking at night anyway but the flashing ball was just so darn cute that we wished it had worked out.

Back to Christmas Eve here in the park and it was Sunday business as usual with 1pm Bocce Ball. My days of hard practicing simply showed that practice means nothing in this game and I ended up by playing 2 and losing 2. It was still good fun and I'm going to miss Bocce when I go home. I may just pop along to Roundhay Park and try and get a game of Crown Green Bowls and really cement my position as a senior citizen.

We agreed we'd have a much scaled down Christmas this year as far as pressie giving goes. I don't think any of us listened though as there are plenty of gaily wrapped boxes around the little table tree and our 3 large knitted stockings are bulding with goodies. I'm not too bothered if Santa can't cope with trailers as we're all set here without him coming and anyway, I'm not all that sure that he even exists. I know. I know. It's a shocking admission but I feel so much better for getting it off my chest.

Well my laptop decided to power off again and it's taken me a while to retype all my ramblings and so it's now Christmas Day here too. Woooohooooo.

I'm glad in a way as now I can really say "Happy Christmas" to each and every one of you who read these posts (I still wish you'd leave comments now and then) and I hope you continue to drop in for a read during 2007.

Gotta go as I can't be awake when Santa comes calling. Yes I know what I said before but it's like being an atheist on his deathbed. I mean, can I take the risk HE might exist ?? Better to believe just in case !!

Young At Heart

I've used the expression "only in America" a lot on this trip and since coming here to our park in central Florida, I've even had to adapt it to "only in Buttonwood Bay"

Age is no barrier to having fun and taking part in fun activities and this was brought home last night with the annual Christmas Golf Cart Parade followed by a cookie fest and entertainment in the rec hall. Just about everyone either took part or turned up for the festivities and a grand evening was had by one and all. Well actually I'd better not claim that as who knows......some may have fallen asleep or not liked parts of the evening and come on, we WERE up after 8pm by the end of it all.

The parade started at 5:30pm at the far end of the park and as it was due to snake along most of the internal streets/roads before ending at the large rec building, we couldn't be sure when it would get to where we'd decided to watch it.

In the end we drove OUR sadly undecorated cart down the hill and just stayed with some friends along the edge of the road which led to the building. We soon had lots more residents eagerly joining us and by 6pm it was almost like we were awaiting the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade in NYC. Almost !

Several 'non parade' carts went by from to time containing people heading for the rec building to be there for the food and entertainment and each one got ironic applause from the gathered watchers and this elicited cheery waves from the occupants. Some seemed to be suggesting they were the No.1 cart that wasn't in the parade but of course I may have interpreted the raised middle finger the wrong way. Well it was dark after all !!!

After wating for over an hour (just how big IS this park ??!!!) the cry went up that the carts were coming and we all perked up. I'd taken a few test shots of the non parade carts to try and get the right camera settings, but in the end I decided to just leave it on 'auto' and keep my fingers crossed. There would definitely be no time for altering settings as carts went by.

As with any decent Christmas parade, Santy Claus and his missus led from the front and as their cart was also in the competition, we immediately knew that there were 22 more carts to come. No getting past us, y'know.

Thankfully there were few visiting kids around as after this parade leading Santa went by, another one and his wife came along. Very confusing for the young and probably just as confusing for a lot of the oldies.
Remember that in here, confusion comes as standard.

The second manifestation of the festive duo was actually more impressive than the first - mainly due to their cart having got an extension. This was obviously the 'well-to-do' Santa who had invested well over the years and together with a good pension and stock market portfolio, was the Santa version of Bill Gates.

We watchers applauded and gasped in a suitable fashion.

One of my favourite carts came soon after as it was made up to look like a

sled. I found this very impressive and it was obvious that a lot of time and effort had gone into it's design.

In the darkness it was actually easy to forget it was, in fact, a golf cart at all. It was the only one that was like this and although some others may have been more impressively decorated, you STILL knew they were just that - decorated golf carts.

I think my vote would've gone to this one for this deception alone.


There had been a buzz around the park for days that someone had removed the top of their cart and added a full sized (and lit) Christmas tree on a platform on the back.

Suddenly it came along and what a sight it was ! Sadly my camera thought it was just too bright for it's liking and took a pathetic shot of it.

Take my word for it (and after all that's all you CAN take - darn my photographic inadequacies), it was awesome.

There was also a cart which reminded us of home - or my my case, my adopted home. Along came a Michigan cart which won a hearty cheer and much whistling from my friends.

I love the irony that a similar cart in a parade in Michigan right now would be stuck in several feet of snow.

Have I mentioned recently how much I'm loving winter in Florida ??!!

I'm loving winter in Florida.

I kept expecting to hear "It's A Small World" or some such Disney type music blaring out as this parade was certainly worthy of being held there.

Once all the carts had passed us by, they parked at the side of the rec building so everyone who wanted to vote for their favourites could have closer inspections. This was definitely needed as much of the detailed work on the carts wasn't obvious at the speed at which they passed us in the parade. I was anxious to examine the 'Bocce' cart which had been decorated by our team mates - who had been fortified by copious amounts of beer and pizza by all accounts.

It brought a tear to my eye. Such craftsmanship, such attention to detail, such expert planning, such a waste of beer !!!

I'll just include one more photo of the carts as any more and I may lose my readers !

This one impressed me as the design and materials used really made it look like it was snow covered.

I'd have given it an award for sure.

It was a prime example of a cart that needed close inspection and again I think the organisers did a great job by having all the carts parked up like this. We were able to walk among them and see what hard work and effort had gone into their creation.

Of course most of the residents had dived inside to get seated at the tables. A lot of park dwellers had gone back to their home states to be with loved ones at Christmas but the rec building was still packed to it's rafters and the air was blue with good natured swearing and cussing as walking frames, oxygen tanks, sticks and other appliances tried to be located next to their owners.

I'm joking......but it was noisy. There are 940 units of one shape or size in this park and I think we may have had squatters or something as it seemed like thousands had turned up for the cookies on offer.

While we all got settled or mingled before getting settled, you could pay $1 for charity and have your pic taken with Mr. & Mrs. Claus and even sit on their knees if you felt so inclined. I assume they were residents too and so would've had relatively aged knees so I felt for them when robust, if not quite portly, residents would go the whole nine yards and plonk themselves down on them.

To my knowledge, no one went crashing in an undignified heap so it was all good fun and hopefully lots of money was raised.

I do wonder at the photographs which will be winging their way via email to the families of these people.

Little Britney and Clint will be looking online and asking their folks.....hey mom/dad, just what medication is nana and gramps on down there ???

Similarly confused and bewildered parents will be replying.....shushhhhh kids. They're happy and medicare is paying for it all !!!

And so the evening wore on and it was cookie time. We all lined up by table and went along the kitchen serving area and picked what we wanted from an incredible assortment of colourful freshly baked goodies.

I mentally asked my cardiologist to look the other way and snapped up about half a dozen of the little artery cloggers and took them back to my seat.

Soon the only sounds in the room were of teeth (real and false) clicking and clacking as half a ton of sweet sweet items were devoured. While not exactly a feeding frenzy, it reminded me of a documentary I'd watched years ago of a pride of lions, or maybe jackels, pulling apart some unfortunate, but thankfully dead, wildebeest. Withered but amazingly stong forearms were a blur and crumbs went flying everywhere and by the time the announcer went to the stage to bring a start to the next phase of the evening, the tables were as bare as the special offers section of WalMart at 5:05am on Black Friday.

We were fed and ready to be entertained.

It turned out that to start with, we had to be the ones to entertain ourselves as communal carol singing was first up.

Led by an enthusiastic little group of singers on stage, we were asked to pick up the carol lyric sheets on each table and basically let it rip. No, not rip the sheets, silly, but sing along with verve and gusto.

Didn't these people notice the oxygen cylinders for goodness sake ?? Many of the assembled audience probably couldn't remember the last time they'd done ANYTHING with much gusto. Ok get your thoughts out of the gutter !!

At this point we did have a potentially nasty moment as some bright spark (maybe not the most apt choice of words) decided to lay down some sort of festive atmosphere by dimming the lights so much that all you could see was the odd twinkling glass eye and a plethera of pearly white dentures. There were low mutterings which soon swelled to loud complaints that no one could now see the carol sheets. If it's one thing I've learned from my time here it's that oldies do NOT put up quietly with things that upset, annoy or generally tick them off.

And quite right too.

So if the sight of hundreds of residents sarcastically raising their carol sheets high above their heads as if to read by moonlight wasn't enough to get the point across, then the din of many more hundreds of geriatric voices wailing their disapproval did the trick - as the lights came back on again and the singing got going.

After that, those who were still able to breathe unaided settled down to listen to the pros. I use the word in a VERY general sence. Some sort of comedy sketch began and we just knew it wasn't going to be up to much as the announcer and chief sketchee warned us there had been no rehearsal and basically she'd no idea what was coming herself.

Lets just say it truely lived down to her expectations and draw a veil over it all. We were all stuffed with cookies and it was close to 8pm so what did we care ?

We did get 3 songs from some 3rd placed 'winner' of a local version of American Idol and although she struggled with some of the notes of Robbie Williams' "Angel", she found her feet with a more upbeat and easier to sing Christmas carol and ended with a song so memorable that I've totally forgotten what it was.

She looked good and was young enough to be my daughter - oh ok my granddaughter - and so was very pleasing on the eye if not the ear.

Finally we had the awards for the winners of the best decorated carts and houses in various categories and suddenly the event was over and the stampede to get home was on. With the benefit of having lived through a similar situation at Thanksgiving, we stayed back a few minutes to let the hoards get out ahead of us as the last thing you need a week before Christmas Day is to have a toe crushed by a speeding oxygen tank or worse still, find yourself in a walking frame sandwich. These people can be vicious when bedtime comes a-callin' and they are not at home.

Once the sounds of squeeling tyres and the smell of burning rubber had gone, we ventured out into the balmy night air and went home ourselves. As we drove along the road and looked at the wonderfully decorated houses with their blaze of Christmas lights merrily twinkling and sending out festive cheer, I decided that these aging residents, who could so easily have sat back and done little or nothing for Christmas, had put to shame many of lesser years who simply shop themselves into debt and call it 'a good Christmas'.

These people gave us all a very prized commodity- their time. As with all things here in Buttonwood Bay, it was given without any wish for payment but just thanks and gratitude and I for one wish to give both in adundance.

Happy Christmas, Buttonwood Bay.

Tis The Season

Well we finally gave in to our own pressure yesterday and bought a Christmas tree.

It's all of 3 feet tall and is sitting proudly on the dining table. Well we ARE in a 5th wheel after all so couldn't go mad with some 7 ft monstrosity that Pixie would probably pull down anyway.

Dennis hasn't seen it yet but as I type this, there is movement in the bedroom - which of course translates to movement all over the trailer ! We hope he'll be delighted with the surprise although the effect won't be as great as it's 9am and although it's a dull start to the day, it's quite bright in here. Deb and I put up the tree late last night after he had gone to bed and we've never erected and decorated a tree in such a short time either.

I'm all in favour of 3 ft trees as you might guess.

The speed of the decorating was improved greatly by the fact that it's a tree with built in fibre optic lights. Awesome. We helped it's looks a lot by getting a strip of 100 extra lights so now when it's switched on, we need to don our sunglasses and slap on factor 25 at least. It's a beast.
I bet the electric meter disc is flying around like a demented buzz saw now.

Sadly the tree has no fairy on top. Hard to get a fairy small enough to perch atop a 3ft tree - so we made do with a nice star shaped bow of the type you see on a well wrapped pressie. It works for me.

I goofed with the tree instructions last night as I was carried along with the over confidence that comes with putting together something with really only 2 parts. You have your tree and you have it's base. Sorted. Well actually, no.

Being a fibre optic tree, the base was quite a technological masterpiece with bits and pieces worthy of the inner workings of the space shuttle. In my haste to see it all up and working, I looked at what I thought was the first page of the instructions as it had 4 little diagrams and I'm really into diagrams when putting things together. Diagrams CAN help to overcome any issues with hilarious but confusing pidgeon English text. You know the sort.

Fasten item 1 with 2 using dropdown of it can be done with flat head driver of screws.

It's always a source of wonder to me that ANY flat pack furniture gets put together at all. I have to assume people just throw the instructions away and muddle through it all with a mix of hope and prayer. I'm sure many a folding chair came in a box labelled dining table and that people are sleeping uneasily on a bed which was really meant to be a bedroom closet.

Anyhoo, back to the tree instructions. I couldn't fault them. They were plain and simple. Me ? Lots of fault as I'm also plain and simple I guess. I somehow missed the first page and, swayed by the diagrams, went straight to page 3. I told Deb, who was hanging on my every word, to get a Philips screwdriver, turn over the base, remove the 4 screws and unscrew the bulb casing. I stopped reading while she did this. Once the screws were on the table and she was trying to stop bits and pieces newly released from the base from joining the screws, I read on.

Remove the old bulb and replace with the new one.

WHAT ? Old bulb ? Replace with what now ? Why would we have to...........oh crap !

I looked at the top of the page and sure enough, there in bold print, were the dreaded words - Instructions for Bulb Replacement. D'oh.

So after Deb had smiled and said, oh never mind, and my arm had stopped throbbing from her blow, the base was reconstructed with the perfectly good existing bulb back in place. The tree (part one) was lowered into the base (part 2) and the deed was done.

I think I muttered that I'd still have liked a diagram !

We added a lot of dangly type ornaments and in the time it takes to say "you are an idiot and I'm a bigger idiot for listening to you", the tree was up and running and worthy to be seen in Trafalgar Square or the Rockefeller Centre or wherever. I'm sure the box packers in some downtown Shanghai industrial complex were clapping (or bowing or doing Tai Chi) in appreciation of our efforts.

And it was all worth it as Dennis stood just now on the top of the 3 little stairs leading from the bedroom and looked in awe at the twinkling masterpiece before him.

"Wow. Wow. That's AWESOME" he finally managed to get out. "Is coffee ready" ?

He's not easily impressed.

You Know You're In Trouble When...............

There was a report on the local tv news here in central Florida last week that made us all laugh out loud. That in itself was fairly unusual as we don't expect to laugh at much on the news these days.

It was also unusual because the news item was not meant to be funny at all and no one on the show even seemed to notice that a part of the otherwise tragic story would crack us up so much.

The news item in question was about a guy who was out walking near some expanse of water when he heard cries for help coming from somewhere nearby. He couldn't track down the exact location and so he rang 911 (which for those of my readers in the UK, is the US version of our 999) and told the operator that he was hearing someone in trouble but hadn't located them yet.

As all 911 calls are recorded, the tv news show then played the tape with the text appearing on screen and this is how it went..............don't quote me on it but it's how I remember it.

GUY : I'm hearing his screams.....he's somewhere close.
911 : Can he hear you ? What help does he need ?
GUY : Heyyyyy.........what's the matter ? Where are you ?
(distant distressed voice) : I'm over here in the water.........gator has my arm. Helppppppppp !!!
GUY : He says a gator has his arm. He needs help.
911 : Oh crap !
GUY : What do I do ??

And so it went on for a while but by then we were on the floor in hysterics. Yes I know it was a serious and potentially tragic story but come on - when do you ever hear an emergency operator say 'oh crap' ??? You KNOW you're in trouble when that happens.

As a follow up to the news report, which remember never DID comment on the 'oh crap' statement, the gator wasn't harmed in any way. So everyone was happy.

The guy with his arm down it's throat ? Oh hell I donno. Never did find out what happened to him !!!

Oh Crap.

Down Mexico Way

I'm just back from spending a long weekend with friends in Mexico.......oh no sorry.........in Gainesville, Georgia. It's a mistake that's easy to make as there seem to be more Mexicans living there than, well non Mexicans I'd better say.

Last Thursday I rented a car from Enterprise in Sebring and the nice people there gave me an upgrade from an Economy to a Full Size and so I got some sort of Nissan with a 2.5l engine which was a lot of oomph for me. So we left our winter home here in Florida because I took Deb across to Tampa as she was flying back to Michigan to be with her daughter-in-law who was having her graduation on Fri/Sat. That was 105 miles for a start. I then drove on up to Gainesville which is about 55 miles north east of Atlanta and that was another 530 miles.

It was a pretty uneventful drive but I was glad I'd my MP3 player with me as there wasn't much to listen to on the radio. I got gas just as I started on I-75 (not me personally, but the car) and when I did the maths to work out that first miles per gallon figure, it came to a woeful 19. I was shocked. Then I noticed something for the first time. When setting off from the Enterprise location, I'd just moved the automatic gear lever down through the normal 'gears' as in Park, Reverse and Neutral. The next gear is usually Drive and this should be where you stay for 99% of the time unless driving around Colorado !!

Before leaving the gas station I looked more closely at the settings and saw that the position directly under Neutral on this car was.......Third ! Opps. That explained the 19 miles to the gallon. On this car you needed to move the lever ACROSS to engage Drive. I did so and the next time I gassed up and did the maths, it returned 29 miles to the gallon. Much better ! Phew.

Anyhoo as I approached Gainesville I noticed a sign claiming it to be the 'chicken capital of the world'. Now America has a thing about assuming that if it's got the biggest, fastest, tallest (you get the message here) person or event or whatever, then it must be the same in the whole universe. Don't get me started on the World Series I beg you !! But in this case, Gainesville's claim seems to have some validity. I used Google and if it agrees, then who am I to argue. It's interesting to note that Buffalo, NY, claims to be the chicken wing capital of the world and Barberton, OH, claims the same title for fried chicken (something which is also claimed by Pittsburg, KS, so fight it out guys) . I'm not sure how these things are measured - is it by amount produced or amount eaten or even amount pooped !!??!!

Sorry, got a bit gross there.

This Google search diverted me for a while and I found a highly amusing, although slightly bizarre, site giving a list of various world locations and their claims to be world capitals of xxxxxx where xxxxxx ranged from fire hydrants to cow chips. I noted that most of these titles were claimed by US towns and cities so read into that what you will. All I know is that if I pass anywhere downwind of Russell Springs (no mention if it's the one in KY or KS), I'll be keeping my car windows firmly closed as it has the dubious honour of being the cow chip capital of the world. Now why on earth would the good citizens of this town make such a claim ? I'd suggest they go off and buy a load of fire hydrants and take over from Albertville, AL, in that particular catagory. The air will be sweeter for their efforts.

But again I've digressed. In 1989 Gainesville was a typical southern town with it's Po' Folks restaurant and fried chicken on sale everywhere. The locals had that s-l-o-w drawl that made me want to finish their sentences for them so that life could go on. I needed an interpreter on my first few visits as it wasn't just a case of individual words being so different but entire paragraphs ! In all my life I'd never mashed a button. I'd mashed potatoes and that was it. Here was someone telling me to mash a button. I think I had a tv remote control in my hand at the time but the statement still made no sence to me. But after a few visits I became (almost) fluent in Southernese and could mash buttons with the best of them. Seems I was a natural.

But that was a lifetime ago and things are very different now. What you hear around Gainesville is much faster speech. If that was all there was to it, then I'd be pleased with the change. Sadly not only has the speaking speeded up but it's also switched from a southern version of English to a langauge from further south again..........Spanish.

The reason is simple : Mexican immigrants, both legal and illegal, swarm into Gainesville to work at the huge poultry processing plants doing the jobs that no one else wants to do - namely dealing with the process of transforming live birds into boneless chicken flesh. A dozen years ago, Fieldale Farms, the largest of these plants, employed fewer than 100 Hispanics. Today, Hispanics total 3,000 in a 4,700-person workforce. The pay starts at $10 an hour which is a glittering prize for an unemployed Mexican back home.

As a result, Gainesville has changed out of all recognition even since I first visited in 1989. Since 1990, the official population has nearly doubled to 32,000 and the number of Hispanics has quadrupled to compose nearly half the registered population -- and far more when illegal immigrants are considered. City schools are now 55 percent Hispanic. More children arrive each day with their undocumented parents, often directly from Mexico. The Yellow Pages include 41 pages in Spanish. St. Michael Catholic church, which once drew 25 people to a monthly Spanish Mass, now has 6,000 Hispanic families on its parish registry.

I saw the influence of all this first hand at the weekend as my friends daughter, locked in my memory as my little 3 year old princess in 1989, had become a lovely 20 year old with a Mexican husband, a 17 month old baby boy and another on the way. I liked the husband, and the baby was a little cutie and they all made up a sweet and loving family and bring obvious joy and pleasure to my friends who now, by the way, go by the names of Nana and Papa. I felt SO old !

So we had a lot of catching up to do and we talked and ate all weekend. There was even time for a visit from my friends gay cousin (who happens to be a grandfather so I'm still working that one out) who I knew from previous visits but hadn't seen for many years. He said I hadn't changed and if anything, looked better now than I did in 1989.

Bless his heart.

Oh I did make one purchase while there that blows my mind. We were in the local WalMart and I saw a pallet of video boxes that caught my eye. For a few months now Deb has been talking about wanting a dvd/vcr recorder combo and the prices HAVE been as low as $158 I think. Now this combo is a dvd recorder as well as a video tape recorder so you can easily record from video to dvd and vice versa. Well on this pallet were boxes of the very unit for.........drum roll please...............$75. Yes folks, $75 or approx £40 in real money. I couldn't believe it. I asked a very helpful and smiling WalMart employee (ok so I know I'm joking) what the scoop was and he said they got them in after Black Friday and they weren't selling so they kept reducing the price. Once they were gone, they'd not be getting anymore and not many stores had them to start with.

I immediately rang Deb in Michigan and as I suspected, she screamed BUY, BUY, BUY. Of course later on, after indeed buying one of the units, I was hit with the realisation that she might have been busy at the graduation ceremony and was in fact screaming BYE, BYE, BYE at me !

Opps.

I keep thinking of my Philips dvd recorder at home which I bought several years ago when they were new on the market and I think I paid almost £450 for it ($900) and now look - you can pick them up for little more than a fill up at the gas station.

Another example of changing times.

And so after this brief visit, I headed back to the welcome heat of Tampa where I picked up Deb and we set off for Sebring. In total I drove close to 1400 miles and listened to about 500 music tracks of MY choice. Apart from a traffic jam in Tampa, I loved every mile. Next time I might have to take my passport and a Spanish phrase book though !

Cost of the car rental - $202.
Cost of the gas - $122.
Cost of seeing my friends again - priceless.

Christmas - Not Holidays

I don't know when 'they' decided that it's not the done thing anymore to use the word Christmas in adverts and stores and even in common greetings. Tomorrow is Dec 1st and although decorations have been up for weeks and it seems store displays have been going for months, as far as I'm concerned, from tomorrow we'll be in the Christmas period.

Now whether this is a happy or sad time for individuals, that's a different matter and simply reflects what's going on in your life right now........and I'm not going to get into that here. Since I started coming to America in 1989, I've only spent a few Christmas periods in the UK. I always knew that over here they say Happy holidays from a few days before Thanksgiving and keep it going till the first few days of New Year. I can see some logic in this as after all, that greeting and the mental imagery behind it, combines the holidays of Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year.

We Brits don't have Thanksgiving of course as we were glad to get rid of those pesky pilgrims ! Only joking. As with several other countries, we do have Harvest Festivals but these aren't important events and certainly not on a par with Thanksgiving Day in the US with it's Macy's Parade, turkey meals and of course, a few NFL games to send us all to sleep while the eaten turkey processes nicely. Gotta recharge the batteries for the exertions of Black Friday after all !

So, ok then, saying Happy Holidays is fine by me. What I DO have a problem with, however, are those people who don't want the word Christmas used at all and try to ban it from schools, stores and just about everywhere - presumably in case it offends those of a non Christian persuasion. Bah and humbug to them all.

I realise that anything to do with Christ is based more on faith than on any historical facts and I think we're all aware and accept that if HE did exist, then he certainly wasn't born on 25th December and all the palaver that goes with this storyline........star in the sky, wise men, gifts and so on. But so what ? Many special holidays and celebrations aren't based on any facts and as long as they serve to focus our thoughts and actions on something good, then I'm all for it.

Again I know that commercialism has taken over Christmas but that's another post topic entirely It seems that the pressures get worse every year for parents and friends to spend way beyond their means and sink deeper into credit card debt to buy presents that may or may not be appreciated by the recipients who have such high expectations now. "Hey mom/dad, what were ya thinking ?? A pc with an 80gb HDD for goodnesss sake !!! How am I supposed to store my ipod tunes on THAT ? And I said widescreen, people. That's WIDE screen ya know. Not this little plasma thing. Geez. I was 'good' all year and this is the thanks I get "

Ok so much for saying that was to be the topic for a different post ! Off my soapbox now.

Well it looked like it would be a good evening for some more sunset watching here and so I jumped on my bike and with my camera around my neck, I headed off down the road to the lake. I went along the edge of the water but before I got to the gazebo (see a previous post for why I call it that), I came upon this critter.

It was walking slowly along finding a few morsels of food every now and then. It was pretty timid and I had to hide behind a thick tree to get this photo - at least that's my story, officer !

The sun had actually set and the bird was almost black but the flash went off and cast a nice light on it.

I was anxious to avoid being bitten again, so I didn't hang around to get any more shots. I was quite pleased with this one anyway and thanks to this plus point for digital photography, I could see the result and leave there and then.

On the way 'home' I decided to go on to get some photos of some of the wonderful CHRISTMAS decorations being put up on homes here in the park. It would be tempting to think that few residents would bother with decorations given that we're in Florida, in a retirement community and we're all oldies But this is far from the truth and many homes are beautifully decorated already and it's still November - just.

This is my favourite and the work that has gone into it's creation is just amazing. Sadly I had my telephoto lens with me and so wasn't able to go back far enough to get the whole display in the photo - but you get the idea from this shot. I also need to experiment more to get better night-time shots But I was also getting bitten and so I wasn't able to mess around too long.

By now it was pitch black and I've no lights on my bike. Many of the evening events start at 6:30pm so a lot of cars and golf carts were out and about in the park and I was a little nervous about riding my bike home. It's not that I couldn't see my way but more that I couldn't be seen by those out driving around.

As a last shot, I zoomed in on the false chimney on top of the car port. If you click on the photo above to enlarge it and look closely at the car port roof, you'll see a red chimney and parts of the outline of Santa and his sledge approaching it from the left.

I didn't realise until I zoomed in that there were bubbles coming out of this false chimney. How cool.

The owner was a bit puzzled as he said they were on a timer and shouldn't be 'blowing' right now. Well maybe not, but it was a bonus for me and I'm glad I was able to get a shot of it all.

Again you'll need to enlarge the photo and you'll see the bubbles over and down the right side of the chimney.

It was time to peddle off and like I said before, I did so with some trepidation. I skirted the pool area without mishap and avoided the golf carts coming towards me and was on the final leg when I almost had a disaster. I was going around the final corner when I came upon a lady out walking her dog. I'm not sure who was the most surprised but i think on reflection that it was her. At least I saw her first and so was prepared for the swerve I had to do to avoid her. She, on the other hand, never saw me until I whizzed past her and she actually jumped. I'd like to apologise to her here and now but I've no idea who she was - mostly as it was VERY dark and I was by her in a second. Sorry, ma'am.

I'd like to think she's forgiven me by now as after all, it IS Christmas and isn't this the time for peace and love to all MEN ??!! If not, then I wish her Happy Holidays. There, I've covered all the bases.